Ravel Ketelaar

I hate the

way I talk to me,

and the way I don’t dare

I hate the way I feel so insecure

I hate it when you stare.

I hate it to not take up space

and the way you read my mind.

I hate me so much

it makes me sick;

it even makes me rhyme.

 

I hate it,

That I hate the way I’m never right.

I hate it when I lie.

I hate it when I make me laugh,

even worse when I make me cry.

 

I hate it when I’m not feeling myself,

But also the fact that I don’t feel.

But mostly I hate the way

the feelings I steal

I hate that I feel so grey

I want to take more space

I hope one day,

it will pay

 

I hate it, that

I hate me

I just want to be free

 

(But mostly) I hate the way,

I don’t hate me

Not even close,

not even a little bit,

not even at all.